This trip was a graduation gift for one of his sons, so he & wife #1 flew 18 hours to visit their crazy Americanized family in the states. On the very first day of their visit to us in Dallas, one of my favorite aunts, who we’ll call #4 (No, she’s not the 4th wife, she’s just the 4th oldest sister on my momma’s side. Dude, you gotta keep up with ancient Chinese tradition here. We can’t call our elders by their name, we use their rank=) made sure to slyly tell me about MOTW’s wifey #2.

After I picked my jaw up and un-widened my squinty, chinky eyes, I just realized that I had never been in the presence of a polygamist before! They all co-exist in one very large house…oh, did I mention they’re millionaires? They own some sort of manufacturing plant, so they bleed money.  I would tell you more about their business, but my moderate grasp of the Chinese language and the slight slur and major accent they had was a bit of a conversation killer. They made their first chunk of change in the shrimping business, but got into this new business over a decade ago and never looked back.

So, after that tidbit of juicy news, I found myself slyly staring at MOTW, #1 and their kid because I was thinking that I would see something that would give me a glimpse of the dirty, nasty, sexual deviants that they are! I looked and looked and talked to them like they were from our planet, giving no notion that I thought they may have been implants from a galaxy far away.

All that effort, and dammit, they disappointed me to no end. They were kind, sensitive, generous, funny, smart and amazing shoppers! Hell, they didn’t even strip down and have wild polygamist sex on my kitchen table. Again, so disappointing.

A great Twitter friend asked what I thought about polygamy.

Had you asked me 10 or even 5 years ago, I would have screamed, “Bitch step back from my man before I claw your eyes out!”

Today, the thought of having a home cooked meal waiting for me after working 15 hours, or someone helping me with the dishes and laundry, or helping with the endless list of errands: well frankly it makes we want to weep with hope. Or what if she would just go earn the big bucks or have a another baby for me to coddle while I get to skip the 9 months of HELL?

There’s been so much attention about polygamy with Oprah’s 4 part series on the Yearning for Zion compound. Though Oprah’s expansive influence and story telling skills gave us a more intimate view on polygamy, my family’s visit solidified the fact that it’s not about days and nights of torrid sex and menage-a-trois, but an effort to create a small village who love each other and a family that is strong and stable, and filthy-stinkin-rich.

It is no secret that the Asian culture promotes polygamy. You can see it in the Chinese films and even the English movie “The King & I.” The King of Siam and his 40 concubines were very relative in that story line.

So now for the sex. Would I have issues with my husband having sex with another “wife?” Much to my husband’s chagrin, the hypothetical answer is: I wouldn’t mind if she’s cooking, cleaning or earning us a pocketful of change while popping out babies for me to snuggle up with. And of course, I would have to choose her because she’s got to like watching American Idol, Grey’s Anatomy and Dancing with the Stars. Darling, that’s what you get when you won’t watch these shows with me yourself.

And truth be told, there are some nights where I am so damn exhausted that I fall asleep sitting on my couch with my laptop whirring away. Not only is that not sexy, but it would be a welcome interception if some lady took the pressure off and took care of my darling-husband-super-dad-big-boss-man with the sex drive of a teenager.

Now, it’s easy to say that I’m ok with my husband having relations with a fictitious 2nd super-wife since I am not presented with this situation. And for my Big J-oda’s sake, I better say this too: we will not be looking for a 2nd wife. I promise baby…

But a 2nd husband…

What do you think? Email me and/or take this poll:

There have been a few major projects in the works that you should anticipate very shortly:

1. I have my amazing new Template Store currently up and running for those of you who have been asking me for a solution, but what’s even more exciting is that by the end of this month you will also have:

• FREE Templates – Simple and easy to use.
• Create Your Own Templates – this is sooo easy!
• Cost Conscious Templates – Sexy templates on a shoe string budget!

2. My Appointment Calendar will allow you to schedule consultation times online. I’m still working to get that confirmed in real time, but one thing you all know I’m not the best at is coding and this  site in particular revolves around doing all the coding myself.

3. HUNDREDS of FREE legal forms will be released shortly for use in your businesses. They are all the human resources forms I used almost daily in my brick & mortar businesses. I’m now making them available to you. Look for these my mid-May.

4. Insight into the Top 10 Coaches that also Twitter.

5. Discussions about Polygamy (have some family here from Thailand and the hubby has 2 wives) so this has been an interesting couple of days. I myself wouldn’t mind some help around the house! Oh wait, they actually hired servants for that.

6. Discussions about Pot: Do you think we should legalize it? Are you pro 420? Or against? And why?

Oh, & don’t forget to cast your vote in the poll on the sidebar!

7. Ok, if we’re going to talk about Polygamy & Pot, we also need the 3rd “P”: Prostitution. Should we legalize it or not? Why?

8. Oh-I should really do this, so I’ll give you my info on the Top 3 Affiliate programs that have been a smashing hit this year for me.

Ok folks, we have lots to cover so let’s get to it…

This topic gets more and more absurd as the various Extenze and Enzyte commercials gain in momentum. (Check out the ridiculously LONG commercial below by Rock Hard Weekend.) Seriously, women are nowhere near as pre-occupied as men on this topic. You guys wake up thinking about your penises: its state, its size, how to satiate it next, how to satiate it sooner, etc.

You try to use the “pleasure of women” as a guise for why you want a larger penis or why you would like to part take in the male enhancement hype, but quite frankly, that’s bullshit. You do it for yourselves. You want to feel better about yourselves and you believe that a larger penis will help you do that, along with more money and a hotter wife. You think that all of these attributes will help you get more nookie.

The Truth

If you spent less time thinking about or trying to figure out how to increase your penis size and more time trying to understand how to make your women feel more desired, then you would get so much more sex than you would know how to handle.

A man that can conquer that technique of truly making a woman feel desired runs the risk of living under a bridge because his woman won’t let him out of bed long enough to go earn a living.

And no, a boner in the back does not make women feel desired, and it’s definitely not foreplay.

An extra inch or two won’t make a damn bit of difference if you don’t know what to do with it. So stop stroking your egos and looking for excuses to be so self-absorbed and put your precious energies into creating a mutually orgasmic experience with the tools you are already blessed with.

Rock Hard Weekend Commericial:

Bad Male Enhancement Infomercial:

by Guest Blogger: Big Joda

To get your article featured here, email me: lee (at) TruthParlor.com. Please note: featured articles are placed free of charge. Your article will be approved based on content.

I played football and basketball in high school and basketball in college. I was good, and this made it hard when we lost a game. In fact, the only thing worse than losing a game was taking a team shower after losing a game. This was my first exposure to the size of another guy’s penis. For a guy who doesn’t like to lose this was a humbling experience indeed. It was the first taste – pardon the expression – I ever got of the manifest fallacy of Lincoln’s basic philosophy: All men are NOT created equal.

It was a few years before I realized that my shower-shriveled hobo’s cigar was not a fair measure of my manhood. I figured everyone lived by the same rule of proportion, a sort of he who liveth by the shriveled sword, envied the unshriveled sword. That is, if you were small before the rush of blood found its home in the corpora cavernosa, you were equally small afterwards.

Boy was I wrong!

Every guy wants a bigger wang. It doesn’t matter how big or small you are, you always want more. We do this because we are capitalists, and we live in a society where greed is good, bigger is better, and he who dies with the most toys wins. There is an old saying among police, “This is my weapon, this is my gun; one is for pleasure and one is for fun.” Show me one toy in the entirety of this small planet that has enjoyed more attention from guys than their own penises and you have a phenomenon that will be the envy of Mattel, Hasbro and every other toymaker in the industrialized world.

But there is more to it. As men we are given limited tools to try and crack the perpetual enigma that is the female member of our species. Hairy backs, sagging balls, yellow teeth, smelly armpits… really, what do we have to offer a woman who has been on guard against the relentless efforts of men to separate her from her virtue since her first class in junior high? But pull down your pants and whip out an eleven-inch monster and suddenly YOU as a guy become the focus, an anatomical curiosity she simply has to learn more about and, of course, experience. Watch the scene from Boogie Nights where Dirk Diggler first exposes himself to Roller Girl and note the wide-eyed face of momentary bewilderment. That is the expression every guy craves when he drops his drawers in front of a prospective lover. ‘I can’t recite poetry and don’t make much money but what do you think of this?!’

I had limited experience with women and tremendous insecurity about the size of my worth so like so many others I decided some years ago to invest in one of those herbal enhancements regimens designed to increase the size of my penis. This was the bellwether of these companies and in order to get the magical pills, I had to surrender my credit card number and agree to at least 60 days worth of pills and ‘exercises.’ Since my satisfaction was guaranteed and my very power as a man was at stake, I willingly agreed. The pills themselves were bland, horse-sized chunks of what looked like pressed-wheat. But the exercises were something I could really get into. These consisted of gently pulling on the penis for 10 to 15 minutes per day. I quickly discovered that this was an unrealistic time frame as my exercises seemed to end after about three and a half minutes… clearly, I didn’t mind. After 60 days I had not grown at all and called for my refund. When the operator on the other end of the phone asked why I wanted a refund, I said it was because I still had a small pecker, thinking this was a light-hearted way to acknowledge the ineffectiveness of the protocol.

I was greeted with silence.

I got my money back and read with some interest a couple of years later that the company was sued for making fraudulent claims. Apparently they had some protection since the FDA doesn’t bother to regulate claims made from herbal products. I had an idea that I could sell pills that would improve memory, cure diabetes, grow penis size, reverse menopause, stop diarrhea, and help pick winners in the stock market. Apparently all one had to do was include the disclaimer, “The FDA has not evaluated claims related to this product” and there would be little fall out.

I just wanted to see a wide-eyed look of bewilderment on the face of the next woman with whom I got naked…

My wife has mentioned on several occasions that she has seen some ‘monsters’ in her day, guys so big that she refused them entry into her body. I always asked what she did to satisfy these hungry monsters (secretly jealous that I was so clearly NOT a monster) who were intent on ruining her birth canal, but she still hasn’t answered. I like it better that way since I get to use my imagination. Reality can sometimes be a drag. I asked her how I stacked up in the hierarchy of penises. In fact, I have asked every woman this same question over the years and have always heard the same answer, “You have a nice size.” I still can’t tell if they are being nice or being honest. But I have reached a point where I no longer care since I measured myself with a ruler and I am well above the national average. One night I placed my erection against my wife’s forearm and discovered it was the same size. This gave me great comfort. Now I don’t have to worry so much that I wasn’t the biggest guy ever in her life because I know I wasn’t the smallest.
Of course, there is always the question of girth. But for now I can always ask my wife to arm wrestle and she will simply shake her head and purse her lips.

I still wonder if that is how she fought off the monsters.